Crooked smile

‘It’s ok.’
They tell me.
‘You were just brainwashed,
by him and the scene he painted.’

And I’ll smile a crooked smile
Asking them ‘what brain?’
‘I lost that way before him.’
‘I’ve always been out of my mind.’

‘It’s the heart that he stole.’
‘And the love that he took,
that now leave me feeling empty.’

It’s when their helpful eyes harden
It’s when their helpful words stop
It’s when their helpful hearts turns to pity
And their attempts fall back into silence,
Over time.

They might still say I’ll bounce back.
They might still offer up themselves
They might still try to make me see the good that’s left
And they might think I’ll miss it eventually
In time.

And all I’ll smile is my crooked smile.
Out of my mind and with a hole for a heart.
Knowing they lost before they started,
Just like I’ve lost.

Myself.

Because you can always talk some sense,
Back into a person…
Where potential is being wasted.
But you can’t glue a shattered heart
back together for another.
No matter how much you want to.
No matter how much you try.

But thank you for trying.