It’s official. I’m turning into one of those porch hag old bitter ladies. You know the type, sitting in their rocker, looking out over their tiny front yard and angrily shaking their fist at the youngsters passing by al raucously, skirting too close to her gardenias.
Now, with my talent for killing flowers I obviously won’t have gardenias, but I’m starting to really get the hang of the excessively angry bitterness for no apparent reason. I should get to work on a quilt to put over my old rickety legs. But I can’t sow either. Dammit.
Him: ‘Hey Z.!’
Right there. Right then. Instantly done. Two words. Or well. One word or a letter was all it took for him to instantly get discarded to the bin of ‘nopes!’
I mean, I gettit. I really do. We all stem from the era of Madonna being shortened to Madge. Rihanna turning into Ri-ri. J-Lo. X-tina. And JB really turned us around. We’ve lived in the worlds of Brangelina, Tomkat, Kimye and the likes. Messing with names just for convenience and parlor tricks is a thing. Apparently. And though I’ve definitely been guilty of using shorts every now and then – you don’t know what it’s like to see my name reduced to one single letter.
My entire life has been lived in a world who conveniently slash out most of my name already. Which is fine, seeing as being called ‘Zoë-Amber’ takes me straight back to a childhood where full-name-use instantly indicated ‘I’m in TROUBLE!’. People calling me Zoë is my preferred tag (although I respond equally well to my gamertag Linqy, or Amber, or any other variation of the two).
But in the end -> my name is Zoë-Amber. And even though I spent a large part of my childhood cursing the ‘specialness’, these days I appreciate it all the more. It’s much easier to be remembered if you’re not one of the three (or four) letterclub. Suck it Anna. Max. Kim. Tara. Suck it!
So when you have the audacity to swipe me right on Tinder and then butcher my name to a single Z. without even knowing anything about me? You’re out. I’ll mourn the loss with a glass of extra bitter lemonade on my porch, an old and very single young lady, shaking my fist at the single-letter-couples out there.
Rant over.
I hope this wasn’t Roy. He seemed like such a nice young man 😁
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😅 Captain no-single- letter names has spoken. Be warned! It is fun having an uncommon name though. It makes you memorable. Happy New Year.
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Bitter lady , well maybe, but old is never a word i would associate with you when I think about you or see your latest post, in my eyes your still young , beautiful and intelligent, a independent woman who knows how to speak her mind, its always a joy to read your posts when i see them, you always bring a smile to my face ❤
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Boy do I agree with you, I hate it when people shorten my name. Especially when I am quite clear when I meet people what my name is and then they immediately shorten it. The worst is when they make you feel like you are being bitchy about it or childish. Stand your ground! haha
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I too hate the combination of names like Brangelina and Kimye. But I have to chuckle when I think of combining the initials of my husband and I which spells GAS 😁
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I can relate. I grit my teeth everytime I introduce myself as Michael, only to have the person put out their hand to shake and say, “Hi Mike!”
It’s amazing how I have any teeth left. Or that I’m not in jail for strangling some poor idiot soul to death.
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Your not a bitter old//young lady. Names are typcially very personal to people. They are not to be messed with.
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Maybe some creative soul will try to spell your name like Elon Musk’s kid X Æ A-Xii.
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Wait…is that really a name?
Noooooo
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😉
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Yep it’s Like
Poetry That
Melts Your
HeART Reel
Ya In
To Love’s
Lair
And Leave
Ya Hi And
Dry
With
Just An
Emoji And Nude ‘Pic’
Swipe
Left
Swipe
Right
Indeed
Shallow
One Emoji
Abbreviated
Soul File The
Pic
In A
Monkey
Bank Sold
To Highest
BidderS
Swipe
Left
Swipe Right
My God Amber
Zoe Is Such
A Beautiful
Name
Never
Staining
A Touch
Now Of
Moonlit Wine
True Dudes Don’t
Understand How
Much Pleasure
How Many Colors
Even 50
Shades
Of Grey
Will
Bring
With No
Pics Yet
The Organ
Above Throbs
For Release
Of
Sunshine
Soul Below
Springing
Butterfly
Wings
Oh Sweet Release
Summer Winter’s
Beach
Behind
Dunes to ‘See’
Wild Flowers
So
Amber
Beautiful
To Breathe
Now To
Be
Clear
This is
Only Rhetoric
i BREaTHE SEnding
To All Other
Audiences
To Teach
Male
Incels
To Touch
More Than
A Nude Pic Sings🎼🦋💫
Look At it This Way
As So Many
Just
Do It
Who Is The
Real Father And
Mother Originating
‘The Child’… Elton John
And His Love Songs
Just For ‘You’
Married
To
The
Author
Of ‘50 Shades
Of Grey’ True
Not All Musical
Instruments
That
Create
Life From
“Big Bang
Explosions” Are
“Organs”
Oh
How
Great Art Thou
Pen is To Birth Breath
Mighty Organ
To Play A Pen is
Still Breathing
Now No Time No
Distance No
Space
No
Matter
No Human
Body At All
Hehe No
Wonder
‘They’
Say Words
Are Nature of Creation
An ‘Invisible God’
Soul Embers Left
Over Now Still
To BREaTHE Amber
Yes “Z” Dear Some Touch
Shallow Others Do IT Deeper 🌊
How Deep is the
Love More
Than Even
Just A Feeling
When You Really
Work For
The
Meal
And You
Are Really
Starving
For
It
Every
Bite
Even
Nibble
Is Truly Heaven
Even Without A Touch
As Feathers Need not
See
The
Wind To
FLoaT Endlessly 😜
In Breeze of Hot Nirvana🔥🥶🔥
Major League Baseball
Players Cover
All
Bases
Hit Home
Runs
Without
Even Touching
Home Base Small
Or Large As A Pen is
Still To Come
Swinging
A Mighty Bat
To Feel So Deep
Where It All
Comes Together
No Lessons Just DIY…🥶🔥😜
Like An Art of
Edging A Dance
And Song
Close
To A Cliff
Not
Falling
Off A
Precipice of Heaven
Or HAha Getting Kicked off 🦟🦋
Swipe Left Swipe Right
Not
All
Dudes
Create Equal🌊🎼
Trivia Note: When
My Mother First
Saw The Rugged
Half Shaven Black
Haired Law Enforcement
Man She
Called
Green Eyes
In The Court House
Working As A Clerk
Typist Yes Voted Having
The Best Figure in
11th And 12th
Grade Marilyn Monroe
Would Have Been
Jealous Fairest
Skin My Father’s
Mother Said She
Ever Saw Just
Dripping With
Fertility of Estrogen
My Mother Thought
That Is The Best Looking
Man She Ever Saw Who
Ever Is Married to
Him Must be
The Luckiest
Woman
oF All To make
A Long Story
Shorter
He Didn’t Say
A Word And
Left
After
3 Years
Easy For Him
To Look at The
Secretaries With
Those Green Eyes
To Do All His Paperwork
‘The Child’ (me)
The Weak Ugly
Duckling
Had to
Learn
To Dance
And Sing
Even To
Taste
One Nibble
Of A HeART
Song in Return
Those Who Fall
Early Rise Higher…
To
Never
Ending
SpringS🍃🌲
Love’s Water Wave
Ocean Whole BRinGS🌊💫
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I’m guessing that Z-babe, Z-girl, and Z-O-rama would get someone banned for life. 😂 Have a great weekend!!
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Whahaha.
Those are actually fucking awesome 👌😋❤
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Oh boy, another post with names…
I had a teacher in high school who always took roll out loud, and he always pronounced my last name wrong. (Dennison is not my real last name; my real last name is one letter off from another common last name pronounced with a different vowel sound.) Two years later I had the same teacher for another class, and instead of always risking getting my name wrong, he just called me “Big G.” (I didn’t mind, I thought it was funny. And I’m about 6 feet 4 inches/190cm, so the “big” part fits.)
I honestly think Zoë-Amber is a cool name. See, I like it enough that I even went in and put the umlaut even though I’m typing on a Windows PC and I had to open the Character Map. But it’s interesting that I should say that, because I briefly dated someone who had two first names (hers technically was her first and middle name, not hyphenated, but her friends who introduced us used it as a double name as if it were hyphenated) and given the way that turned out, one would think I would have sworn off all girls with double first names again. But I just think it sounds better that way. At that time, she was trying to switch over to going by her initials instead, but most of our mutual friends still called her by both names. And initials are weird, because some names as initials sound better than others. “AJ” and “JR” are cool names. “CW” and “HN” are not.
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How about new tag;
Zoe Hell on Wheels:
who knows who would come out of the wood work then.. on second thought…..hey,not sure you saw my Heaven and Hell post on
Fri-Yay funday( W.P.) hell posted yesterday and said 2 days ago.. you’ll love it i think. lmk
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Rant over…..for now. However, do not despair. I will be here for the time it rears its head again.
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🥳🥳 rantparty booyeaaaah
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That’s a party worth attending.
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Not bitter, not old, fully agree. Your name is your name. If they can’t respect your name, what else will they disrespect!?
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Z hardly seems enough. It’s not as if the names you go by are long or complicated.
I go by Christopher, which admittedly is long. Even so, I’m saddened when others use the nickname, even when I haven’t used it in our introductions to each other.
Sigh. I guess I’ll need a porch, too.
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It’s ok Chris, it’s ok 😈😈
I’m kidding of course. I don’t think Christopher is too long at all. It’s awesome and sophisticated. Of course you don’t want that shortened!
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Hah, you’re funny! And thank you. My mother named me after Christopher Robin, so I figure I should go with that.
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CHRISADELLA here…. and I feel you! I usually go by Chrissy and most call me Christy initially and I always correct them (“No T!”) because your name is something people should absolutely get right! It’s the first thing someone learns about you! 😌
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Exactly!
I love your name btw!
It’s special without that awkward ‘really wrong spelling’ feel 👌🥰
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Thanks ❤️❤️😌
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For someone who prefers anonymity here… if someone doesn’t use my full first name when talking to me in real life – I simply refuse to answer! 😉🖤
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Reblogged this on The Reluctant Poet.
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Oh wow… just the Z eh? That’s not a good way to start!
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Nooooope!
Good way to instantly end tho 🤭
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Yeah you said it 😂
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Heh. It takes a lot for me to overcome my irritation at anyone who calls me Sue. It’s Sue Ann. I introduce myself as such. I sign my email that way. I also wrote a blog rant about that a while back! Suna is my alternative name. That’s fine. I want my two syllables.
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Double names are apparently hellish for most mere mortals or summin 🤫
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This is so annoying, someone recently took to calling me Tee which does not in anyway correlate with my name Yetunde, so I stopped responding to them. That should teach them!
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Whoa – that is indeed out of line in the namebutchering department! Good on ya!
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So I started reading your posts because I noticed you had so many followers, and in your post you mention it was in a very short amount of time. I wondered what made your site so interesting to others, and I figured it out. Your posts are witty, alive, and, for lack of a better word, interesting. I am really enjoying checking out your site and all that you have to offer. Thanks!
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That is an awfully complimentary discovery right there – thanks so much for those kind words!
Glad you are enjoying yourself, awesome comment!
🔥🥳👌
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