Tinder is often seen as the promiscuous den of the dating debauched (and unsuccessful). Something which, as my years tick on (and the faces on it remain quite unchanging) is becoming painfully obvious. Throughout the past 4 years I’ve been on Tinder on and off (mostly off, because my tolerance for the inherent dip-shit levels tends to be quite low) and noticed a couple of things:
* A large part of the ‘population’ is constantly made up out of the same ‘people’ (or catfishes).
Every time I get ‘back’ into the game, I scroll past the guys who have somehow become so familiar to me that I could pick them out a line-up (assuming they actually still look like the exact same pictures they’ve been using for the past 4 years.) I wonder how long it takes them to change an approach, if using decade old pictures is fine to them.
(And, considering how easy it is to score out there – it makes you wonder how much STD’s they must’ve collected in that time….GOTTA CATCH ‘EM ALL)
* An even larger part of the dating pool is not ACTUALLY interested in dating.
When you treat Tinder like it’s Thuisbezorgd (a food ordering app) for ‘encounters of a sexual nature’ – it makes you wonder how they’re ever going to find their way back into the realms of being the perfect son/daughter-in-law. They’re gonna KNOW. #slutshamingisreal.
* And a small (thank god) part of the Tinder crowd is just…generally….creepy.
They take three messages to fly into a conspiracy theory battle, or reveal their insane world views or dated ideas and misogyny faster than a mosquito finds my exposed ankle when I sit on the couch. Which, in a way, is a good thing of course (because at least you won’t end up ACTUALLY dating them). But there’s levels of creepy creepiness, I fear. And one of those types of fellas sadly knows how to use the internet. Which makes them extra creepy.
Seeing as I work in an IT-company, I feel like I’m (slightly) more aware of the ‘findability’ of things on the web. And though keeping a personal blog, with my picture and intimate information might seem like evidence to the contrary – I do try to be aware of my online presence. I’ve done the ‘Google’ yourself thing every 6 months, making sure I delete/remove entries in the top search results to keep my profile clean – and (as you may have noticed) don’t actually put my name and other searchable items on this blog. When you do Google me, you spot my Linkedin, some writing exploits and my Facebook profile. Not much else (not counting some comments I made during my last blogging-time in 2017). Nothing too spectacular.
HOWEVER. I am, sadly, the only person with my name (at least in the Netherlands). So when I get my ass on Tinder (and not take the effort to change my username to something less exploitable) – Tinder kind of loses its purpose. Because…the entire charm of that app is SWIPING AWAY when you’re NOT interested in a person. When these people, however, do not stop at the swiping level, but take the effort to Google my name and proceed to add me on Facebook, Instagram or whatever other medium they get their hands on. That kind of defeats the purpose.
I get it about twice a week, when I do get active on Tinder. Guys messaging me (and unexpectedly ((NOT!)) always the ones I swipe left) on a medium other than the app to still make a connection. But let me tell you what that does:
They instantly receive about 500 creep points, three turn-off strikes and a tendency to report them to some authority or other when they take the effort of going to such extreme (ok, not that extreme, but still creepy) lengths of virtual stalking. Because no matter how you try to justify it – abusing the fact that my parents gave me a recognizable name is a punishment that is not befitting of trying to improve my dating life through Tinder.
Up for some more Tinder Tales?
Tinder Tales – Picture Perfect
Tinder Tales – Virtually Unique
Tinder Tales – Why ARE we here?
Tinder Tales – Darn those algorithms!
Tinder Tales – Anal.
Tinder Tales – Picky
Tinder Tales – But what does it mean?!
Tinder Tales – The curious case of the neckbeard
6 thoughts on “Tinder Tales – Virtually unique.”
I understand the tolerance part. You giving four years to it still is really commendable. 👏
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I knew nothing about Tinder so this was all news to me…
but so much of it still felt eerily familiar.
I went out with a couple of old friends last night, for the first time un what feels like the rotation of a small but perfectly formed galaxy, and watched a couple of couples talk and laugh and share… and then lean closer and kiss a little as last orders were called.
I found myself wondering how they managed to make it look so easy.
Lovely light touch on this blog, btw.
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Thanks for the compliment 🥳💪
And I am with you on the ‘it looks easy’ part. Which is unfair. Cause it isn’t.
The struggle is real. It’s the moment you wish your parents lastname is ‘de Vries’ of ‘Jansen’. But ow noo it had to be that special one.
And really what’s up with those old photo’s. 🤷🏾♀️